Have You Ever Been In Love?
by Paige Darke
Summary: Angel and Connor have a heart to heart. AU. Connor/Original Character, mention of B/A. WILL BE NO C/A!


Title - Have You Ever Been In Love?  
  
Author - Paige Darke  
  
Rating - PG-13  
  
Pairings - Connor/OC, B/A  
  
Summary - Connor and Angel have a heart to heart.  
  
A/N - Timeline's mangled. Connor never sank Angel to the bottom of the ocean because that's inconvenient for.  
  
Timeline - After a modified S3.  
  
She was so beautiful. How could he have missed it for all this time? Missed her beauty? She glowed...  
  
Connor sighed and shifted his back against the stones of the hotel roof. He had come up here to get away from everything. Cordelia, for starters, with her holier-than-thou fucking attitude, and Groo, who groveled at her feet, and Lorne and Fred who kept insisting that Cordelia and Angel were perfect for each other.  
  
And Angel not doing anything to stop those ridiculous statements!  
  
Connor made a face. He absolutely /refused/ to have Cordelia for a step- mother, no matter what Lorne said was in his father's soul or how much Fred insisted they were perfect together. It was just...gross.  
  
And then there was the person he was spending most of his time avoiding. Paige. She hadn't been with them for very long, just a couple months. She'd blown into their lives like a small, magical hurricane. Her clan, the Kalderash, had sent her to prevent him from attaining anything even remotely resembling true happiness.  
  
She'd bound his soul and apologized for her clan.  
  
Then she'd been banished.  
  
So she'd hung around, and helped, and Connor had fallen in love with her, a peice at a time.  
  
And Paige had honestly admitted she thought of him as nothing more than a friend. Her best friend! And he had been completely unprepared for how much that hurt. Or how much it hurt, tonight, when she'd asked him how she looked in her new dress, the one she'd bought especially for her date with some...dick on the swim team.  
  
Connor scowled and sat up straight, staring at the L.A. horizon.  
  
"Deep thoughts?" inquired a deep, familiar voice from behind him.  
  
Connor sighed. The /last/ thing he needed was some air-brained, Cordelia- esque lecture from his father. "Yeah, kinda."  
  
"Paige isn't back yet," the vampire said softly, and Connor stared up at him, a bit surprised.  
  
"No," he agreed. There was quiet for awhile.  
  
"Have you ever been in love?" Connor asked suddenly. "No, don't say anything. Not about Cordelia."  
  
Angel suddenly laughed, and Connor looked at him suspiciously, shifting away. That laughter...it was scary, maniacal, more like he wanted to cry but didn't dare. "I'm not in love with Cordelia, Connor."  
  
Connor snorted. "Could've fooled me."  
  
Angel turned and looked back at his son, leaning against the wall. "Why? Because I don't argue with Lorne and Fred when they insist we're soulmates? Because I care about her? I do love her, Connor. She's like a sister to me. But if you think it's any more than that, then you need to open your fucking eyes and /look/."  
  
"What about your soulmate?" Connor asked sarcastically. "Cordelia's so fucking sure that if the curse was still an issue, one night with her and your soul would be gone."  
  
Another bitter laugh. "Cordelia's blind, and you fucking well know it, Connor. And I've already met my soulmate."  
  
Connor stared at his father's face for a long moment. "So you have. Been in love, I mean."  
  
Angel was silent for a long moment, staring out at the city skyline. "Yes. Once."  
  
"What was she like?" Connor asked, noticing the way his father's face softened.  
  
"Beautiful. Firey. Full of life...She was...light. Personified."  
  
Connor's brown eyes went wide. "You're still in love with her."  
  
Angel looked back at her, a bitter half-smile twisting his lips. "Of course. I couldn't fall out of love with her if I tried. I've...always loved her. Even without my soul, all I want is her."  
  
Dark eyes, exactly like his, narrowed in suspicion. "Then why aren't you with her?"  
  
"I left her," he said bluntly. "I had to. I gave her lame fucking excuses about sunshine and children, but it was really because if I spent any more time around her, my soul wasn't sure."  
  
"So you left to protect her."  
  
"And everyone else," Angel replied, his voice quiet. "Connor...the way you look at Paige...is the way I used to look at her. With love. You need to tell her, before it's too late."  
  
Connor swallowed hard. "She doesn't love me."  
  
Angel shrugged. "Whatever you say, son."  
  
Connor scowled. "I fucking hate it when you do that."  
  
Another frightening laugh. "So did she."  
  
Connor rose to his feet, hesitantly walking to his father's side. "Maybe you should go see her, tell her that Paige -- " They both ignored the way his voice caught on her name -- "bound your soul."  
  
Angel slowly shook his head. "She's moved on. Without me."  
  
Connor was very still for a long moment. "What was her name?"  
  
Connor watched his father's eyes grow distant. "Buffy. Buffy Summers."  
  
Connor was waiting for Paige in the lobby when she came in. He was sharpening his knives. Most guys would've tried to look busy other ways, like with a book. But, alas, he didn't know how to read. So sharpening it was.  
  
She walked in, her pretty red dress mussed and an extremely pissed off expression on her face. Connor saw the bruise on her jaw and popped to his feet. "What happened? Are you okay?"  
  
She nodded, then winced as he lightly brushed his fingers over her bruised jaw. "Ow," she whispered, and started to cry.  
  
Connor immediately pulled her into his arms, a tight, feirce embrace. "I'm so sorry, so sorry. I should've been there. Please don't cry, I love you."  
  
Paige's head came up from his shoulder the same instant Connor jerked away and muttered, "Sorry. Shouldn't've said that."  
  
Paige's blue eyes narrowed. "That depends. Is it true?"  
  
Caught in her eyes, all he could do is nod helplessly.  
  
Tears flooded her eyes and she touched his face. "Oh, Connor...I thought you didn't like me..."  
  
His eyes went wide, and he kissed her.  
  
A few moments later, someone cleared their throat near the door. Connor looked up, and his eyes went wide when he saw the petite blonde. She was beautiful, almost...  
  
Almost /light personified./  
  
She smiled. "Is Angel here? It's really important."  
  
The End 


End file.
